search burger
search ×

Why do we always end up cheating?

In search of the reasons that for centuries lead us to be unfaithful


Nothing is certain when one betrays. Except historical facts. They date back to 1968 and 1969 respectively the abolition in Italy of the crime of adultery, for which the adulterous wife is punished with imprisonment up to a year and the crime of concubine, betrayal of the man towards the woman. Nevertheless, the pillory for those who betray is always around the corner and also in all the newspapers.

Visualizza questo post su Instagram

Un post condiviso da Elena Zauli - Psicologa e terapeuta mindfulness (@thelenazauli)

Very recently the episode of the banker of Turin who blurted out the betrayal of the future wife at the pre-wedding party, humiliating the ex-partner and washing the dirty laundry at a party more public than private.

Since there is no common denominator, the studies of the couple therapist Esther Perel are - with all respect - served little, the act of betrayal continues to remain an annoying arcane. It calls into question the self-esteem of ego-relateds and shatters that of the insecure at the start.

Visualizza questo post su Instagram

Un post condiviso da Valentino Menghi (@valentinomenghi)

But what is right to do when you find out you are betrayed and what when you can’t stop cheating? Nothing. Or rather, nothing recommended at the moment. It is fundamental, however, to put your soul in peace about why you betray yourself. It is, in fact, a stereotype that men betray physical need and women because they want to fall in love again. In general, adventures have little to do with sex and much with desire. Today in love stories it is claimed to be joined by the soul mate who considers us first in all the competitions you can imagine. Betrayal, then, brings us back to reality: we are not first for anyone, only for ourselves (and only in the case of ego-related).

Visualizza questo post su Instagram

Un post condiviso da La Cultura Positiva (@laculturapositiva)

The survey carried out in March 2023 by, the portal where to look for an escapade in total anonymity, reveals that Lombardy, with a propensity to betray 80.5%, is the Italian region where the phenomenon of extramarital adventures is most widespread. Second was Lazio followed by Campania.

And what does our friend GPT think? Wizard of lists, includes some obvious reasons including:

  • Dissatisfaction in the report
  • Attraction to someone else
  • Search for emotions or adventure
  • Personal problems
  • Opportunity
Visualizza questo post su Instagram

Un post condiviso da (

But he wants to specify: "cheating is often painful for all involved and can have serious repercussions on relationships. Open and honest communication between partners is critical to addressing challenges within a relationship and preventing infidelity".





Illustration by Gloria Dozio - Acrimònia Studios