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Climate vs calendar: what will happen to the controlled parties?

The trend of temperatures and the passing of days on the calendar have lost the harmony of a time giving rise to a misalignment that sometimes leaves disoriented: not being able to move the climate, maybe we should review the calendar of more or less commanded holidays.

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The old popular adage according to which there are no more half seasons seems to have been in fact updated by a half seasonality that invests many months of the year, with a few peaks of winter cold and several months of absurd heat. The rest is a spring swing with a few water bombs just to stir the situation. A climatic picture that puts in crisis the meteorologists (who launch themselves in forecasts now out of date even if they refer to the following 24 hours) and calendars, on which it is increasingly difficult to match days and parties ordered. The climate and nature tend to confuse us, as if it wasn’t easy enough to do it yourself.

February 14, for example, would be Valentine’s Day and the custom requires that red roses and similar flowers shine the economy, tie it or not, that revolves around the spontaneous parties commanded like this. And yet, looking around you can see that the prevailing color, at least in the middle south of the country, is the yellow of the mimosas that are definitely early on March 8th and are starting to decorate hills and avenues with their fluffy bloom. An additional element of trouble for all those partners in various ways that tend to forget anniversaries and anniversaries and that are certainly not helped to remember them by the undue presence of mimosas too close to Valentine’s Day. 

 
 
 
 
 
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Un post condiviso da Alfa Notizie (@alfavarese)

Then, of course, in the days before March 8 of these flowers around will not be found and only those thawed, like the tropical prawns of the supermarket, will be available on the market. With the obvious warning to deliver the yellow bunch quickly, before the defrosting is final and the relative withering completely spoils the welcome gesture.

And, speaking of cold and ice, not even the tradition of skiing is free from climate change. The first months of the year were considered, by the lovers of the matter, days to dedicate to intrepid skiing on the immaculate alpine snows. Perhaps it is still so, but it is these days the survey of the Dolomites according to which in Vipiteno, at night, were recorded 17 degrees, in Val Venosta they enjoyed the hottest night - for the period - of the last 100 years while on Monte Grappa the mercury column marked 13.3 degrees at 1540 meters above sea level. Imagine the discomfort of being at altitude with padded overalls, gloves and wool scarf while the sun slowly cooks you... 

 
 
 
 
 
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Un post condiviso da meteo.it (@meteo.it)

A picture that seems to bring within the scope of reasonableness the famous climbers in flip-flops, which far from being reckless are now the true precursors of the right mountain clothing.

Even the traditions related to Christmas are likely to be upset by the evident mutation, although not accepted by all peacefully, of average temperatures and weather phenomena. The Christmas Markets, with their load of hot chocolate, boiling wine, ultra-caloric sweets and polenta with roe deer, will soon be unavoidably out of context, also because in many valley towns, such as Bolzano and Merano, the heat is obviously felt even more than at high altitude. It will then be necessary to update the menus with watermelon, coconut and ice cream, replacing mulled wine with a very cold spritz. Even the Christmas shopping will have to be remodulated, because giving away scarves and sweaters when outside there are more than 10 degrees would make those gifts still pleasant than they were already. 

We could therefore think, thanks to the imminence of the European elections, of proposing a point to be added to the electoral programmes of the parties most open to innovation: moving all the parties to bring them into line with the new climate. We move Christmas to mid-January, hoping that at that point there will be some cool. Easter at the end of May, so on Monday you can make decent trips, no umbrella but with the picnic basket. Valentine’s Day and March 8 there we merge by incorporation placing the new holiday on March 1, when the mimosas are in bloom and should not be imported from vattelapesca or exhumed from freezers. 

Can we do it? 

 

 

Illustration by Gloria Dozio - Acrimònia Studios