They always know everything and whatever you plan to do, they have already done it. Already organised with the support of 20 convenient (according to them) Excel files. Everyone has at least one friend or relative who belongs to this category: the head of the complications office.
The head of the complication office is that character who makes any simple action, celebration or initiative cumbersome.
They have to organise their birthday? They will weigh it up as if they were in charge of the organisation of Expo 2015. They will formulate an Excel whose use could be considered abstruse by even the most stubborn of engineers. Columns for +1 participation, intolerances, dog presence, child presence. It is not so much being too organised that is their problem, but the obsessive over-analysis with which they approach life.
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If they have to go on a road trip, they will hysterically calculate 10 days in advance how many autogrilles there are from point A to point B, also reading all the reviews of each of those autogrilles where they will probably never stop. Who knows anything about this psychotic attitude is poor Magda from Bianco, Rosso e Verdone.
The head of the complications department has several certificates of contribution to the community in all the platforms for leaving reviews. There is no restaurant he goes to that can avoid the report of overly chatty or overly taciturn waiters, tasty or extremely tasteless food, annoying noise in the indoor area or unwelcome breeze on his shoulders.
Relationships are, of course, handled in the same way. The people they associate with are categorised impeccably, and the lack of mental elasticity allows little room for their hearts too.
But in short: why all these Excel and platforms if in the end it is all so complicated?
Illustration by Gloria Dozio - Acrimònia Studios
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